Final Scour!

United go into tomorrow night's game against the Coleraine scum knowing this is our last chance to give the scum a good cleansing. They are of course long overdue a good pasting but unfortunately the United team spirit is at such a low ebb, a massive injection of pride will be needed in order to right recent wrongs. With United already slipping back to 9th position in the league table, courtesy of Glenavon losing to Dungannon Swifts tonight, the Swifts now move ahead of us, by a slender single point. We can go a long way to alleviating the situation by recording a win at the home of the gas men tomorrow night.

United need to field their strongest starting 11 and if that means playing Boydie from the start, then so be it. Scoring goals has once again been our downfall, or should we say the 'lack' of scoring goals has been our downfall. With the gas men also missing out on the coveted top six position, no doubt they will be out to prevent United from gaining the upper hand, but gain it we must. No-one could fault our fans if they failed to make the journey to Ballycastle Road tomorrow night, they have been let down so many times in the past, but we still expect them to turn up for this one. With our fans behind us anything can happen, so come on Sky Blues, let's shag those stinkin gas men!

If But!

Or should that be but if? We are like Roy Walker and the Sky Blues, we haven't got a bloody clue. Can United, with a 4-0 win and defeats for Coleraine and Distillery, claim an unlikely and undeserved sixth place? If the United manager had addressed the two problem positions that United have had since he took over, poor to average goalkeeper and below average goal-scoring ratio, we would surely have had the coveted sixth place weeks ago. Instead he chose to sign a keeper he obviously never watched, or at least we hope he never watched, because if he had watched him, surely he would never have signed him. He then released Kevin Kelbie without offering him any terms and signed Gary McCutcheon who only averages a goal every three games, if this is progress we can't see it.

But maybe we're being premature here, maybe Roy has an ace up his sleeve, some young striker he's going to unleash on the unsuspecting Newry City defence tomorrow. We think not, surely his selection of Mr negative himself, Gavin Taggart, for the game away to Dungannon just about sums up our attack minded management. Taggart's philosophy seems to be, 'why make a forward pass when you can pass it back'. Caff, having served his suspension on Tuesday night will be available for selection, if the manager wants to select him. Surely we're at the stage where its 'win or bust' and we must come out with 'all guns blazing', admittedly a positive result will only count if other results go our way, but if we must fail, let's fail with a bang.

Even the prospect of four home games if we are doomed to the bottom six would be of scant compensation, given these two big factors. Firstly, except for Glenavon, not one of the likely candidates for bottom six (Newry, Dungannon and D.C. are definitely in there), can bring anything but a mediocre crowd. Secondly our home form is so crap we'd be lucky, nay very lucky, to get more than two points from our home games. Much better to be in the top six and only at home to Cliftonville and Linfield, two draws in these games and seven points from the other three will do very nicely. OK, so we're dreaming, but it doesn't cost nothing, so why shouldn't we. Let's hope our dream is still alive after tomorrow's game at the Marshes. So here we go, come on Sky Blues, let's shag those canal boys!

Swift Decision!

United are in dire need of a win at Stangmore Park Dungannon tomorrow night, but a close win won't do, as our goals against column is none too good. Just winning at the home of the 'chicken' supporters will be tough enough, but the need for goals is paramount if we are to gain a top six place. Three points in their last two games would secure a top six finish for Portadown, while the Coleraine scum are catchable but their goal difference is superior to ours, hence the need for goals. The scum's last game is against D.C. who are involved in a relegation dogfight with Newry and they could have a big influence on who makes the top six. It's still all up for grabs but since our defeat on Saturday we must get two wins from our next two games and score highly or we will need a favour from someone else.

United will go into the game without on-loan midfielder Caff who is suspended, but with central defender Albert restored to the fold after serving his suspension on Saturday past. Ex-Linfield player Paul McAreavey looked fairly impressive when coming on as a sub and he may get the nod in place of Caff, where his tough tackling and competitive approach may be significant. Whatever permutation the United manager chooses in the end they will need to be up for this game and need to improve their goal-scoring ratio to chances created, which at the moment is pretty poor, create ten openings, score just two goals, it just won't do. Sky Blue Sport won't be there as we continue to boycott the home of the liars, so United will have to manage without us, but we'll still be rooting for them, that's for sure, so come on Sky Blues, go shag those chicken stuffers!

Muddy Waters!

We've been on the Carling web site and studied the proposed fixtures when the split occurs. All we can say is it's as clear as mud, we can't make head nor tail of it and feel it's like trying to explain the 'offside rule' to the uninitiated. The best scenario is if Lisburn Distillery finish 5th and we finish 6th, otherwise it will be pandemonium. Only the I.F.A. could make such a simple task so complicated and why the panic, surely they could've waited another couple of weeks, instead of going off half cocked as usual.

But on to more important things, United take on Glentoran tomorrow, having dropped to eighth in the table and surely 3 points are a must if United still harbour thoughts of entering the top six. Archie came through a midweek reserve game unscathed and should fill in at central defence for the suspended Albert. Also missing from the United starting line-up, are Andy Smith, Aaron Boyd and Westy, while Eamon Murray failed to train on Thurs past. If Lee Colligan is fit to resume at left back, Captain Gazza, should be released to his midfield role alongside Caff. Barring the unavailability of Murray the rest of the United line-up should be the same as that which started at new Ballyskeagh. So it's all hands to the pump, come on Sky Blues, let's shag those east Townies!

Chicken Run!

United undertake what should hopefully be their last Chicken run this season or with a wee bit of luck any season for at least a year. It´s our understanding that United still haven´t been paid by the Swifts for the signing of goalkeeper Sean O´Neill. Surely by this stage even the I.F.A. will have little option but to deduct points from the Swifts, which would then plunge them into relegation trouble, we at ´Sport won´t mourn their passing. In fact it would be poetic justice as far as we are conserned, as the old saying goes, ýour lies will find you out´.

There´s no need for us to go over the old ground about what lies we are talking about and Sky Blue Sport will continue to boycott the Stangmore Park fixture as we have done since the concocted story about our supporters, but Rusty Ray may be there. But enough chit chat, United must keep focused on the task ahead as they strive to secure a top six finish. Unfortunately our fate isn´t entirely in our own hands as other teams need to drop points as well as us winning them. But all we can do is our best and if we do that as a team, we at ´Sport believe it´ll be enough.

Hopefully United will have a full panel to select from as Archie and Lee will be badly missed as United face three potential ´finals´ in the next fortnight, while the two trialists should return. The game of course may not take place tomorrow as snow is forecast and yet another postponement could mean a midweek trip to Dungannon for the Sky Blues. If this happens, which it could, it´d be better to get the game played sooner rather than later as we wouldn´t want it to be a vital game for us, would we? We have enough on our plate without worrying about the vagaries of the weather, or whether the game is played sooner rather than later.

Albert, will need to be on his toes once more, as he was last week. Never have we seen Glenn Ferguson as quiet as he was last Saturday, in fact Albert had him spiked! His adversay tomorrow, Timmy Adamson, needs no introduction to United players or fans as he generally leaves a big impression on both. With fans it´s with his goalscoring, while with players it´s generally with his studs and he always gets away with it. But maybe his luck will run out tomorrow, maybe for once it´s the turn of the good guys, so come on Sky Blues, let´s shag those Chicken farmers!

Hanging On!

Believe it or not we're still in with an outside chance of a top six finish, but it's no longer just up to us, we'll also need somebody to give us a wee leg-up as well. Having said that, there's an old saying about 'helping yourself' and that's what we have to start doing. Ten points might be enough to help us sneak into the top six, but 12 would be even better, but we'll still need a wee bit of help from other clubs. So it's vital that we get back to winning ways tomorrow at Ballyskeagh, this was always going to be a crucial fixture for us, but now thanks to our recent slump it's probably the 'biggest' game of the season. If that in itself wasn't enough there's also the wee bit of unfinished business from our last visit to this footballing wilderness, when we were falsely accused of abusing an injured Distillery player, who in the end wasn't badly injured at all.

No doubt Tommy 'never' Wright, who walked out on United with hardly a 'by your leave', won't even consider an apology's necessary, but we will remind him. United fans will be cheered by the news that flying winger Eamon Murray should be fit to resume, but on the 'flip side', Archie, Aaron Boyd and Andy Smith are all out injured. In the absence of a striking partner for Cutch we believe United should go for a 4,5,1 formation, which looks negative on paper, but can also be an attacking formation. Gazza, who had a horror in defence, against the Crues, should be pushed into central midfield alongside Caff and George Young. With Murray on one wing a start could either be given to Mo or Ryan Berry on the other. The back four should be, Mikey, Lee, Albert and Denver and of course Cutch up front, but Murray and Mo/Berry, encouraged to get up along with him when possible.

This formation of course will confuse Tommy Wright, if nothing else and hopefully by the time he figures it out United will have the points all wrapped up. Sounds good doesn't it, but it'll hardly be quite that simple, although it is basically a simple game. Simply score more goals than your opponent and you will be the victor, it's only human tinkering that makes it complicated. Our defence will have to be strong as well for the Whites are a big strong side, while former United player Dessie Loughrey, will do us no favours as referee. It's going to be tough, it's going to be rough, but it can be glorious and definitely victorious, so come on Sky Blues let's shag those Lambeggars!